One Last Kiss Before I Go (Levi x Reader)

    Levi tumbled off his horse and hit the ground running. The sun was peaking over the horizon but he still couldn't see anything. The world was a blur of noise, smells, colors. Sympathetic glances were exchanged amongst his comrades as he whirred past them. The slapdash medical camp outside the walls wasn't set up for practice. It was for an all too real a purpose. The Wall Rose repair team had perished in a flurry of gigantic hands and teeth.

    The bodies were everywhere. A torso here, a limb there. The doctors and volunteers had a hard time identifying all of the bodies. They had to use process of elimination from the corpses already sent back behind the walls.

    When Hange had burst into his room this morning, glasses smeared with tears, the sinking feeling the Captain had hardbound all day came to fruition. He had woken up with a sick twist to his stomach. Who would have known his instincts were trying to warn him.

    The young scientist had spilled out a mess of words that sounded like "New special Titans...", "(Name)...", and "They couldn't..." Never before in his life had Levi felt so ungodly terrified.

    A hand was peeking out of the tall grass surrounding an ancient oak tree. He swallowed harshly, his bile rising and threatening to make an appearance. His slowed down now to avoid the inevitable. Levi's short legs shook before collapsing beside the body.

    There was no question it was you. Your big eyes were staring up at the sky, unseeing of the orange and magenta hues of early morning. Your nose, obviously broken, still retained a margin of it's cute shape. Under a thick layer of crusted blood your skin would still be smooth as porcelain. Levi felt a wave of denial cripple his heart.

    "Wake up." He shook your shoulders. "I said wake up, brat! This is an order, wake up!"

    In his fit of frustration, he took hold of you, setting his head down on your cold chest. He should have held you more.

    Your shoulders trembled ever so slightly as you hunched over, face buried in your hands. You thought you were sneaky, hiding away in the pantry where no one would look for you. Levi starred, one eyebrow raised.

    "What's the matter with you?" He asked nonchalantly.

    You looked up from your perch on a barrel of oats. Your irises were rimmed with red and pooling with tears. He was struck by the beauty in those eyes. He would like to see them again when you were happy.

    "A friend of mine was taken the other day, by one of them." Your voice cracked with effort. "I-I just want to throw myself off of one of the walls and end it."

    "Tough shit. That's something we all have to deal with and I expect you to keep your composure. You owe it to the rest of your team. "

    "How can you say that to me?"

    "I know you, (Last). You're the captain of your squad and the last thing they want to see is there leader crying like a pansy. They've seen enough crap out there. I want you to clean yourself up, rally your troops, and move on." He sighed, shifting his weight. "Fight for your lost friends. Don't give up because of them. If you do, then what the hell did they die for in the first place?"

    You nodded slowly, ceasing your tears.

    "Thank you, captain.

    "You're welcome. Now where the hell do they keep the Earl Gray in here?"

    He slid his handkerchief out of his pocket, meticulously wiping away at the viscera staining your cheeks. You were gorgeous. Why couldn't he say that to you. Force the fucking words out. He always acted like a complete ass. One kind word. That's all you needed.

    He had pretended he didn't notice the whole day. The new haircut, a bit of blush, the shining studs of rarely used earrings. Levi had kept to his paperwork, never once divulging in his wants during the numerous times you entered his office. He settled for the more neutral compliment.

    "You look...nice. Could you hand these documents off to Erwin on your way out?"

    If Levi were a softer heart, he would have told you at once that you looked pretty. Beautiful. Stunning. There just wasn't any room for things like that in war. Admitting attraction was like showing off the chinks in your armor. It wasn't done.

    Later that night, you sat up in your room. You wiped the makeup off while the full moon shone in through the window. He really didn't pick up on things, did he. You let a tear escape, smearing what was left on your face. You fell asleep feeling ugly.

    The number of times he should have kissed you. When you both ended up under the mistletoe at Christmas and he brushed you off. On his birthday when you bought him a book set for his study, only to receive a curt thank you. There was one memory that came to light as he glared at your now clean lips.

    "Thanks for eating with me tonight, captain." You rubbed at your arm nervously.

    "Eh, you're an alright cook. It would have been dumb to say no." He shrugged.

    "You're always so coarse, Levi." You shook your head with a laugh. "C'mon, tell me how you really feel!"

    "It was a nice change."

    "Well, at least that's something."

    You two had bonded over the years. The sweet face of a new leader had strengthened into a powerful young woman, and the foul mouthed thug had shaped into quite the captain. You weren't the strongest of relationships, you would often annoy the hell out of Levi and he would end up insulting you, but in times like these it was good to have someone.

    "I guess this is goodnight." You spoke up again, stopping outside the door to his chambers.

    Levi looked at you with deep gray eyes, igniting something in the gap between you. You both subconsciously leaned forward, so close that you could hear one another breathing. Was he going to...?

    "Goodnight, (Last)." He stopped himself just in time.

    You smiled tightly as he stepped into his room and closed the door. You were yet again the victim of wishful thinking.

    Levi hovered over your still face, heart snapping in two. He always wanted to kiss you. From the first damn day he saw you out in the practice fields, he felt inclined to just sweep you up and plant a kiss on those peach lips. He supposed now he was the one being weak. Levi couldn't even follow his own advice.

    "Goodbye, (Name)." He whispered, pressing a kiss to your warm lips.


    Wait. Warm.

    "Get a doctor down here, now!" He yelled to a nearby cadet, scooping you up bridal style.

    He would carry you all the way to Armin's ocean if it meant what he was thinking was true.


    You sniffed, turning over in bed. Why the hell were your sheets so itchy. They didn't even feel like...

    Your eyed fluttered open, starring down at the blanket. They didn't even feel like your bed set. This wasn't your bed.

    You looked around, confused by the blinding white of the walls. Did you have a fever? Why were you in the castle medical bay? What the hell is going on?

    "Levi?" You croaked out, nudging that man who sat in a chair next to your bed. "Levi? What happened? Did I fall during training?"

    While he groggily shifted, you felt the oncoming pressure of pain hidden behind medication. Your nose felt fucking awful.

    You pressed your fingertips to the bridge of your nose, only feeling soft padding of a bandage. Your legs weren't feeling so hot either. They were both in casts. And your head, oh God, your head was throbbing like crazy.

    "Oh no..." You exclaimed, pressing a hand to your forehead. "What am  going to do? I can't move in my gear like this."

    Your companion finally stirred awake, yawning.

    "(Name)?" He blinked. "You're awake!"

    "Yeah, and my head feels like it's in a vice. Mind catching me up to date? I can't remember a thing past breakfast yesterday."

    He paused, searching for the right words. Levi truly wanted to just squeeze you tight and never let go, but he figured that would worsen your condition. Especially in your innocent state, you would just ask more questions.

    "(Name), you weren't awake yesterday. Or the day before that. You've been in a coma for about a month now." For once in his life, he spoke gently.

    You stared blankly at him, your mouth parted. He was lying. This was a prank and Hange and Erwin were in on it. Probably a bet he made with Jeager, make (Last) believe she was in a coma. Yeah, funny.

    A flood of memories hit you like a brick wall. The blood. Blood was everywhere, you couldn't move your legs, you were army crawling across the ground. One of those monsters had grabbed your gear's wires, sending you to the skull first into the dirt. Your nose, legs, and head were busted in. If you could make it to a hiding spot, maybe you would be okay.

    The faces of your team mates flashed around you. You had been heading away from the wall, trying to lure the enemy away. If they got into the crack spider webbing across Wall Rose, thousands could be killed. Your team followed suit, playing cat and mouse with the Titans. You all had made it to the forest when another Titan appeared. It was a hundred times stronger than it's companions, demolishing your defensive strategies. Your second in command took him/it down, but not before half the team was a mess on the ground. They couldn't find you, you were too well hidden in the grass. In your weakened state, you prayed they would be okay.

    The world was going black around you, fogging over in a haze. You breathed out a final "Levi..." before accepting your supposed death.

    You started to scream in your hospital bed. Levi held you and let you cry it all out. Even in your hysteria, it even came to pass through your mind that this was the first time he'd ever even hugged you like this. His ebony hair pressed into your cheek, just like it did in all your dreams involving the older captain.

    It took a few weeks for you to come to terms that the majority of your team was dead or injured beyond military service. The doctor said that you would heal within a year, and you would still suffer from short term memory set backs from the coma. You couldn't wait for the day where you could be out there again, slaying every last Titan that broke up your army family.

    "Something else is coming back..." You murmured, sitting listlessly in bed.

    Levi looked up from his make shift desk in your room, his cute reading glasses slipping down his nose.

    "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." He shrugged, penning down something that seemed important.

    "No...I want to." You gave a half grin. "When I was out, you kissed me, didn't you?"

    Levi's ears turned crimson, bowing his head more assertively now.

    "I have no idea what you're talking about."

    During your time healing up, they had given you a small room in the upper levels of the castle to heal up and stay as active as you could. It was close enough to Levi's office to where he visited you near constantly.

    "Aw! You did, don't deny it. It's very rude to take advantage of a lady while they're sleeping."

    "It was when I thought you were dead. "

    "Ew, what are you, a necrophiliac?"

    "You're an asshole, you know that?" He chuckled with a roll of his eyes.

    "From what I remember, it was a vey nice kiss." You offered, motioning for him to come forward.

    He set aside his work and followed your orders. Levi was a sucker for pretty girls who needed nursing. He was almost motherly at heart. It helped a little that he was wrapped around your little finger, but he would never admit that out loud
.
    You pulled him down by his cravat, giving him another sweet kiss on the lips. Levi felt his shoulder become lighter, as if some great weight had been lifted off them. This was the way he was supposed to kiss you. While you were a thriving, happy, fantastic little girl curled beneath him. From now on, he wasn't keeping anything from you.

    Especially not the engraved engagement ring he would buy about two months from now. But, that's a story for later.